IGotNewsForYou: Home Page



Send Funny, Personalized Fake News

Take a look at the sample funny, mock news page below.

Click the headlines to pick new stories.

You can create a news page just like this for your friends. It's easy!

There's a short form to fill out, so the stories are personalized, and the page is created. You pick the stories and send the news page by email.

Check out more samples: Raunchy | For Female Recipient | George Bush | Bill Clinton

Send a Funny, Personalized Fake News Page

Today's Weather:
Cloudy with sunny, rainy, snowy and foggy conditions. A thunderstorm and hail warning is in effect. Tonight, darkness expected.

NEW YORK | SUNDAY, MARCH 21, 2010 | The Nation's Oldest Daily | Since last week
http://www.IGotNewsForYou.com
Today's Sports Scores:
12, 3, 4, 8, 67 and a 3 to 3 tie.

Today's Winning Lottery Numbers:
None of yours!

New York Man Strangled!

Local man found dead, his shorts wrapped tightly around his throat. Police say murder 'underwear settling of accounts'.

Toady's Health Column!

"Dyslexics Untie!" urges Benjamin Yoskovitz, VP of Dyslexia Assistance Org (DOA). "Say 'ON' to ridicule, and tarts aid programs."

IN FOCUS

Iran Softens Stand

In an apparent shift to less radical policies, and in order to ease international condemnation over the president's recent speeches denying the Holocaust and Israel's right to exist, Iranian foreign minister Assman Bin Yoskovitzmoud informed the UN of a significant change in government policy.
      He announced the intention to provide every Israeli man, woman and child with an Iranian-made flotation device...before driving them into the sea.


What a Guy!

Cartoon ....Khartoum

Iranian film director Assami Bin Yoskovitz has announced plans to begin production of his country's first full length animated feature film.The movie, entitled "OH SAMMY, WHERE ART THOU?" follows the hilarious madcap adventures of a bumbling Al'Qaeda suicide bomber as he travels throughout the world trying to blow up various targets, as well as himself.
      The director has already cast the characters' voices, but their identities are being kept secret because several of them are in hiding somewhere in the mountains of Afghanistan.

New U.S. Political Party Formed

Combines Worst Of Others' Platforms

        Republicrat Mascot

After an international search among certified mentally-unstable persons, Benjamin Yoskovitz of New York, the United States, has been chosen to lead a new U.S. political party, the Republicrats, which aims to incorporate the worst qualities of Democrats and Republicans.
      Party chairman Yoskovitz said he was tired of parties that only do things halfway.
"But combining the corruption and heartless social agenda of the Republicans with the disorganization and runaway spending of the Democrats - well, that's the whole package," he said.
      The ambitious party platform includes programs such as raising taxes 200 percent to buy everybody more guns, and giving huge tax cuts to same-sex couples who marry, whether they're gay or not.
      Unfortunately, the party's first presidential candidate, Al Jones, has already been forced to resign after being caught in a compromising position with an intern. Jones claims only to have been looking for a WMD in the intern's underwear.

Film To Be Missed By Millions

A New York man has been chosen to star in a depressing independent film that nobody will see. "Apparently they're looking for 'regular people' to highlight the true nature of mankind," said Benjamin Yoskovitz, who appears as 'Leslie,' a gay plumber in the film, entitled "47 Conversations About Nothing."
      The film will be released simultaneously to theaters, DVD, TV and bootleggers. "We want to provide as many people as possible the opportunity to not see it," said Yoskovitz, who apparently had some tough competition for the role, including more than a dozen street hobos, two convicted killers, and several cardboard cutouts.
      When released, many Film Academy members are planning to use the free DVDs as coasters.

Greed Pays!

Last night, in New York, loan-shark boss Benjamin Yoskovitz announced plans to lower interest rates on outstanding loan balances to a respectable five percent from seven percent per week.
      In an exclusive interview with NFY reporter, Al Jones, Yoskovitz appeared in a darkened room with his face turned from the camera and his voice disguised by a scrambler. He added that in order to stay competitive with other major money lenders he was immediately reducing the penalty on overdue payments by 50%, from two broken legs to one.

* Mark Antony of the Clairvoyants Society has cancelled tonight's meeting due to unforeseen events. Page B8

* Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
Al Jones, Crime Reporter

FOR SALE, by aspiring drag queen who has recently given up skydiving and watching TV...

Parachute, only used once, never opened, small stain.
Contact Benjamin Yoskovitz at New York Hospital, Rehabilitation Ward.

Benjamin Yoskovitz, engineer at Microsoft Advises New Business Grads!

"There are two rules for success. One: Don't tell all you know."